A Rainbow of Words

Saturday, July 14, 2007

it aint easy

heys.

it aint easy to do loads of things :
1) aint easy to score straight As
2) aint easy to be a good daughter
3) aint easy to be a good sister
4) aint easy to be a good sister inlaw
5) aint easy even to be a friend (nt to mention good fren)
6) and the list goes on..
7) nt even easy to sleep okays?!

hais.. it aint easy.. tt's y we cannot rely on our own strength but rely on GOD.

i know i've been a bitch. well, sku's been a bitch. its nt like i dun care and am nt bothered abt the way u ppl view me okays? but i nid somewhere where i can really let go right? i mean everything is jus bottled in there.

u ppl say i'm hostile. then y dun u guys oso tink y i react tt way sometimes? i'm always being the mediator. and sometimes it sucks. i dunno what to say and i dunno which side to stand on. it HURTS sitting on the fence. i hate myself most of the time too!

i know i've hurt many of u with my words and actions. and i know if i say sorry nw i seem so much like a hypocrite coz y apologise when i've already done u guys wrong. but whatever it is, i'm stil sorry okayS?!

pls jus bear with me thru this entry and let me rant. i'm really very frustrated... :/

i'm nt frustrated at anyone. jus frustrated with myself.

i know, tired isnt the best excuse or it isnt an excuse at all to allow myself to be like tt. but i really am EXHAUSTED! i'm dead tired. like seriously!

if my wkends are gonna be burnt out like this, i seriously dunno hw long i'll last. its tiring. whole day out. one fat day at sku. with all the complains and bitching and gossiping. trying my best to evade them and to take it one ear in and one ear out. and nt get affected by it.. then come for cell hoping to share and feel better but the whole thingy ending so late jus makes it worse.

SEMBAWANG is FAR! okay?! i hate to say this, but i take 1 BUS, 1 TRAIN and another BUS and walk down the fat lane to get home OKAY?! yeah. i know, its my prob. doesnt concern u guys. BUT ITS DAMNNNN TIRING TO TRAVEL OKAYS?!!! (RENA i'm sorry i used tt word. but it describes it perfectly..) ://

mayb, jus a suggestion, we start slightly earlier like at 7 or mayb dun play games so that we can end a little earlier?

and and, OPEN your eyes man! there're other ppl out there tt nids encouragement and pressies.. i cant jus keep giving lah.. its tiring. its draining. LORD, fill my love tank pls, fill it all the way to the brim so tt i can love others like how U love me.

love.
CHARI ** ((:

Slid down the rainbow at 00:14

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