A Rainbow of Words

Sunday, June 08, 2008

L.O.V.E

hii.

i haven blogged in a while coz been busy and tired and stuff.

been out with the youth almost like everyday. as in so it seems. (this may sound wrong,) but i tink i nid to stop hanging out... i nid to be grounded. i nid to have more solid rules. i cant be playing every single day. i nid to rest. i nid to study.

i tink the last time i said something like tt, and hoped ppl understood was either in yr 1 or last yr. i'm falling sick and stuff. and i dun tink my health shud be placed on the line. ://

i'm extremely moody. and i nid to get out of this mood. i'm really nt feeling well. i dun feel like miting anyone.

u know wad guys? everytime i mit u ppl, i dun wana go home. WHY? coz i enjoy ur company and i wana spend time with u ppl, and each time u see me down and stuff, its becoz i'm hurting inside and having a major conflict whether to go home or to hang out.

moreover, going home alone takes a lot of getting used to. where's ernest, josh, cassandra, marcus? but today wasnt tt bad, coz i read the book i borrowed frm sus. :) and i completed it.

i'm oso officially broke. which tells me and us one ting, we nid to stop going out to play stuff tt we nida pay for. i nid to control spending. the next thing is that, i'm FAT. yeah. F-A-T. and i nida diet. i was telling sus and glow today tt i prolly nid to stop eating for the next 40years!! i'm so OMGoodness-ly FAT. :(( and stop telling me i'm NOT fat. i am. i seriously prefer the truth than to tell me something jus to make me happy. i mean, nt wrong lah, but in this case, like i see and feel myself fat. so u can still try to convince me i'm not. if u want to. HA.

okayy, why my title is LOVE today, is becoz i tink LOVE is such an amazing thing.

as i was reading the book i borrowed frm sus, titled "GOD'S BLOGS", i learned and picked out stuff. like i felt i was in a whole new dimension.. seriously, the book is simply amazing.

LOVE is such a COOL word. coz, sometimes its so tough to love. and sometimes its so tough NOT to love. LOL. and i finally found out why i cudnt be angry with someone forever, coz i CAN'T NOT love. coz GOD is LOVE.

and i love. i love so many things.
i love LAughter.
i love SMILES
i Love BOWLING.
i love pool-ingg
i love BEING able to play all day long.
i love DANCING
i LOVE Daddy. and mummy. and gina. and ben. and rena. and joel/le. :))

i sometimes, jus want to be immensed in GOD's presence, and nv get out of it. like NEVER. i mean, why is it i'm still stuck in what i am after so long? i really nid to learn to say NO! i nid to say NO. no. no. no. :/// but its always to the things that i wana do, that i like to do, i kinda realised, i miss doing things that made me smile. that gave me warmth. that reminded me i'm loved.

thots and memories of those days will never fade. but they arent for eternity. only my walk with GOD is. and its better to jus keep some things as memories than to dwell and form certain soul ties that doesnt glorify GOD.

i dunno hw to stress the importance of walking close to PAPA GOD, having a relationship, being able to talk to HIM about anything and everything. how am i supposed to jot all of tt down? it might take forever to blog then. coz GOD is forever. :)) timelessness.

but i'm quite tired too. and i guess i'm sick coz i walked in the rain. forgive and forget. too many things to forget. little actually worth remembering.

i nid to hibernate. i nid to go away. to run into HIS presence. my mind is in a whirl. and its killing me. giving me so much pain, causing me to tink so much and thus, producing something called, A HEADACHE. :((

nitex ppl.

in HIS love.
CHARI ** ((:

Slid down the rainbow at 23:28

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